Celebrating Assisted Living Week

This week ends National Assisted Living Week. You probably were completely unaware of this week of honoring assisted living, especially since we also honored and remembered events that changed our world with the 9/11 tragedies.

But while most of us missed the party, for millions of seniors and their families throughout the U.S. the celebration took place quietly and in an everyday sort of way. It is a celebration nonetheless of a kind of care that wasn't even available just a few years ago.

Less than a generation ago, seniors who needed care had fewer options. Most either went straight into a nursing home or remained at home with family caregivers.

The family caregiver pool diminished dramatically with the growth of women in the workforce, and nursing homes were clearly not the best environment for many seniors who didn't really have medical needs.

And so a new level of care developed that offered support for daily living tasks but minimal nursing care. It was developed on a model, too, that specifically and intentionally feels and looks more like home (or, in many cases, a nice hotel) than like an institution - another aspect that set it apart from nursing homes.

Today families have options for care that range from in-home care (one of the fastest growing segments of elder care today) to assisted living communities to nursing homes that now incorporate many of the values of person-centered care that assisted living has made the norm.

As a society facing an aging population and a potential crisis in care options, we have many reasons to celebrate assisted living this week. Here's my personal word of thanks for all the folks who provide this care, from the investor and developer to the care staff who give so many families a good night sleep knowing their loved one is in good, caring, compassionate hands.

Michael Jackson Had It Right

Michael Jackson turned 50 this year - a milestone many of us have already passed. I admit, I've tended to think of Jackson more as "Wacko Jacko" recently than as someone who changed the world, albeit in his own small sphere.

Maybe because of the milestone birthday, or simply the youngsters' desire to revitalize some of my generation's "oldies," but Michael Jackson's music has become popular again.

Twice this summer I saw dance performances set to his song, "Man in the Mirror," and it's gotten stuck in my head. The message in this Michael Jackson song got it exactly right:

If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change.

In my small corner of the world, I'm working hard to make the world a better place for frail, dependent elders. I remind myself often that making the world a better place starts with what I do, every single day.

As a colleague and I were discussing yesterday, if we want to change the world of senior care, we've got to change the way we train the folks who actually deliver the hands' on care.

So today, join me in looking at the person in the mirror and making a decision to change the world.

Moving Day - Getting the Folks into Retirement Housing

Last weekend, over the Labor Day holiday, we moved my husband's parents out of their home of 55 years and into a retirement apartment.

We all worried about them that last night in their home. Would they feel remorse over the sale and decision to move? Would they be grief-stricken at the thought of actually moving out?

As the family converged early Saturday morning - kids, grandkids, aunts and uncles - we were met by two busy, scurrying people, laughing and working hard to pack the last few things in the house. Both were clearly eager to move on with their lives; neither showed any sign of sadness.

I usually get elected to have the heart-to-heart with the folks to make sure they're really coping OK. As I took my mother-in-law aside to check in with her, she was beaming. "I can't wait to be as happy as all of those other people living there," she said. Clearly, she was ready to make the move.

Later, I asked my dad-in-law how he was doing. He started reciting a list of repairs needed to the house - roof, electrical, plumbing - ending with a big sigh. "I don't have to worry about any of those things now - I couldn't be more relieved."

The move went smoothly. The stuff they couldn't part with was pretty much crammed into their new 1 bedroom apartment, but they were smiling and happy. As the entire family sat down for lunch together in the retirement community's dining room, we all felt a sense of accomplishment and a hope of the promise: tomorrow will be better. We won't have to worry about them being alone and isolated in their house. They don't have to navigate stairs, mow the lawn and climb up on ladders anymore.

A couple of years ago when this whole process began I had a conversation with my mom-in-law about moving. What I said then, and believe today, is that where you live is much less important than how you live. I believe that this move will make a qualitative difference in the HOW of my loved ones' lives.